Taming Your SharpWoman's Green-eyed Monster
Submitted by SharpMan Editorial Team on Thursday 14th October 2010- It’s not your fault the ladies are after you.
- Love the one you’re with.
- Continue to be the life of the party.
"Who was that girl, and why was she talking to you?"
Men throughout the ages have cringed at hearing this line coming from the mouth of their beloved. It’s an inevitable question snarled by a woman who perceives another woman as an imminent threat to her personal homeland security. That means you.
Read on for some timely tips on taming the green-eyed monster:
It’s Probably Not Your Fault
The location doesn’t matter – it could be happy hour, a golf course, the beach, or a dinner party – but suddenly another woman appears on your wife or girlfriend’s radar and you find yourself deadlocked between innocent party banter and a date that can only end in scorched earth.
Even loyal, above reproach, boyfriend behavior will not prevent some women, at some time, from displaying or harboring irrational jealousy. It is for these cases, that we offer suggestions to help alter your SharpWoman’s perception of your interactions with other women.
Charm is Not a Curse
Charm and an attractive outward appearance are not negative traits. Any man who’s been living up to his true SharpMan image has learned to exude charisma that is inherently attractive to the opposite sex. In fact, it’s probably the very thing that made you irresistible to your date in the first place.
However, there’s nothing charming about an ugly scene so it’s in your best interest to quickly and completely put your sweetheart at ease. Regardless of whether she’s being irrational. If you ignore her protective attitude, she may take it as callous ambivalence. If you stop talking to other women, you run the risk of being branded an antisocial party-pooper.
Bring Everyone Into the Conversation
When you pick up the vibe of extra interest from the woman you're speaking with, immediately expand the circle of conversation to include a larger group. By doing this, you'll avoid the intimacy of one-on-one. Bringing others into the conversation has the added benefit of making you appear to be the life of the party. Bask in the glow, but do it with your lady at your side.
Exaggerate Physical Gestures
When something ignites your date’s sense of territorial danger, the first thing she is likely to feel is insecure. (Anger and bitter recriminations come later, big guy.) An easy way to show her she has nothing to fear is by being openly affectionate. Small things mean a lot in this situation, such as an arm around her waist, a quick massage of her shoulders, or just taking her hand. If she’s the only one you’re touching in a loving manner, she’ll know she has nothing to worry about. Moreover, she will also appreciate your willingness to be affectionate to her in the company of this other woman, as she will see this as a communication of an established relationship to this other woman.
Networking Happens
You’re already in a relationship, so getting another girl’s phone number doesn’t mean you’re picking up on her. (Anyway, that’s our story and we’re sticking to it…) We’re sure there’s a legitimate reason you need to be able to contact this new person, but to a slightly jealous girlfriend, it can appear that you’re setting up "Plan B".
Think about asking your date to get the phone number for you. It’s a way of making both women feel comfortable about your intentions. It wouldn’t hurt to gather some phone numbers of the guys at the party as well, just for balance.
Inside Jokes
If you’re the life of the party, your woman might feel a little left out. If this occurs, it might be time to give her a little more attention without having to leave the party. A well-timed inside joke can do the trick nicely. It allows you to provide a quick, verbal cue to her without having to break the flow of the conversation.
What do we mean by "inside joke?" We mean: a quick comment, quip or play on words that only your date will understand. Inside jokes are the rocket-propelled grenades of the flirtatious world. They’re simple to operate, can be used just about anywhere, and are effective in bringing down a stubborn foe. Women tend to love sentimentality. By shooting an intimate comment her way, she will feel a link has been established. Without actually saying it, this type of comment implies there is something special between the two of you.
Drinks By the Round
Buying a drink for a good buddy should always seem like a friendly gesture, but if your "friend" happens to be an attractive female, you risk setting your date on edge. If you’d like to be a gentlemen and offer her a drink, consider making it a round for everyone, or at least a small group -- with your date included.
"Girlfriend" or "Wife"
Maybe your SharpWoman doesn’t know the rest of the gang and they don’t know her. If she’s sure that all the other women know her role as the "girlfriend" or "wife", she’ll be happier and more relaxed.
Introduce her to people using those words. Once she knows that your relationship has been established amongst the group, she’ll be much more comfortable seeing you talk to other women.
Don’t worry about other women ignoring you once they know you have a girlfriend. It is more likely that women will talk to you more when they know you’re in a relationship. It may actually increase their comfort level with you and intrigue them. After all, women are competitive, too, right?
Just be careful – the innocent, friendly type is irresistible to many women. But I’m sure you won’t mind.
This article last updated on Thursday 14th October 2010