The Write Stuff
Submitted by SharpMan Editorial Team on Thursday 14th October 2010- Hand-to-hand convos.
- Avoid a computer snafu.
- Stand out, not around.
Jeff Bolton was being bad-vibed into buying some holiday wrapping paper to support a colleague’s kid’s school or something. He thumbed through the catalogue, taking in his options.
"I don’t do wrapping paper," said Jeff. "And ordering months-old candy wasn’t too appealing, so I settled on a pack of ‘assorted greeting cards’. It was cheap and wouldn’t take up much drawer space until I figured I’d kept it long enough and could throw it out."
A few months after his pack of greeting cards arrived, Jeff’s computer died — one of those horrible techno deaths that causes a person to ask, "what do I do now?"
"I’d gone out on a date and wanted to send a quick day-after e-mail to the woman. In other words, I wanted to say thank you, but didn’t want the whole ‘live, in-person’ thing. Problem was, it was pouring rain outside, and I didn’t feel like heading out to an Internet café, so I dug out the greeting cards and wrote her a note, instead. She LOVED it…I mean, she went on and on about how wonderful and romantic I was. I mean, who knew?"
Jeff is now on his third pack of assorted greeting cards. He’s also branched out into gray linen stationary for business letters. For more information on implements of elegant writing, see SharpToy’s Why Cool Pens = Women.
Just a year ago it would not occur to most red-blooded American males to commit their thoughts — romantic, shallow or otherwise — to actual paper. Now, however, several influences have conspired to suggest that guys ought to reconsider this position...
Avoid the Computer SNAFU
So, how do you plan to send your next communication? Will you drag a chair up to your keyboard and bang out another note that may — or may not — be read within the next several days, depending upon the mood of the recipient? Or will you go the extra (several) miles and send a good, solid, I’m-holding-it-in-my-hand note?
What’s the difference? Few people can put off till tomorrow reading a letter that arrived today. There’s just something about it that demands our immediate attention. (Unless, of course, the person in question is the type to let the phone ring and not bother to find out who left a message — those people are hopeless — and not that interested in hearing from you, by the way.)
As it turns out, there is a greater trend among men and women to rethink the rush to e-mail. Perhaps, it’s because absolutely anything you input into your computer is available to just about anyone in the world who cares enough to hack into it.
How do you like the idea of Bill Gates reading your inner most thoughts about Viagra? Or suppose your one and only girl in the world manages to stumble across an e-mail you thoughtlessly dashed off to your other only girl in the world? (Oops…)
Now think about the growing numbers of people who have LEGAL access to your e-mail. Your boss, for example, if you happen to be using your computer at work. Your company has an absolute right to check up on what you write during the time you are on the payroll. The government, if they decide to check out the books you’ve chosen to read and discuss. And this list is growing.
In a conversation regarding the insecurity of e-mail, one anonymous computer geek compared it to "going away for the weekend and leaving every door and window in your house open." According to this source, it is that easy for anyone to access your words.
Stand Out, Not Around
Obvious cautionary tales about privacy aside (after all, you’ve heard them all, already) there are other, more positive reasons to join the growing number of people who are returning to the art of letter writing. And believe it, it is an art.
As with all things relating to social intercourse, there are a number of guidelines to consider in making this retro approach to communications work for you.
Take the business letter, for example. While it doesn’t seem to matter whether you type or handwrite the letter, appearance is very important. So is tone. You must consider your audience. Supreme Court Justices are not known to appreciate funny letters from people they’ve never met. On the other hand, if your correspondence is with Chris Rock, then by all means, yuck it up…
Start with the appearance of your letter. You can tailor it to your recipient in much the same way you tailor the appearance of your e-mail. But with a hand-written note, your recipient will also appreciate the time you took to get the stamp and paste it on the envelope that you addressed with your own hand. Are you great or what?
Consider your potential future employer for that job you desperately want. You have been through the opening interview and you want to send him or her the obligatory thank-you-for-the-interview letter.
You can toss out an e-mail in no time…and assume that it will get equal attention. Or, you can find fine stationery and a tone that reflects what you’ve learned about your target (whoops), or rather, your interviewer. Then choose a type font that, while businesslike, is friendlier than Times Roman. Type, er, print it out on your carefully chosen paper… sign and send.
If your interviewer seemed up tight and repressed, don’t push the just-between-us-guys button. And be sure not to trust all the editing to spell check. A sloppy letter that allows the word "there" when a "their" is required does not create a good impression. Take your time. Read and reread, and then, ask a friend to check it one more time. Jobs have been lost over an "I before E, except after C." No friend available to proofread your note? Type it out, spell check, re-read for proper word usage and then handwrite your letter from this approved version.
Now, sit back and picture this: your future boss has interviewed 27 applicants for your job. Every other clod sent an e-mail. All used the same kind of paper… all used Times Roman… except you. Yours arrived in a PERSONALLY addressed envelope, slightly different in color (nothing too flashy) and standing out in the crowd. Net-net? Yours got the attention it deserves. And you, of course, got the job. All because you took the time to write and send an actual letter.
Unless you are desperate, it isn’t a good idea to "borrow" copy from a book or article. One guy lost out because he plagiarized text the employer was familiar with. Incidentally, if you can think of some way to personalize the letter without fawning, do it.
One small, but important point. MAKE SURE YOU HAVE THE INTERVIEWER’S NAME AND POSITION CORRECT. An error in this area can be deadly.
The Love Letter Can Make Your Year
Let’s move on. Think about that wonderful SharpWoman you held last night. Like Jeff, you’d like to thank her, wouldn’t you? Even if — in all honesty — she should be thanking you, right? Women love getting beautiful letters telling them about the magic of the night you shared. And an e-mail to that effect just isn’t going to cut it.
SharpNote: Of all the letters you will ever write, the love letter should be the most carefully crafted. It demands the right balance of total candor and total lack of candor. It is the one most likely to be read and reread, interpreted and then reinterpreted. It is the one that will be saved forever and possibly regretted for the same length of time.
If the idea of sending a love letter strikes you as a kind of wimpy undertaking, perhaps you should read this excerpt from a love letter penned by the Emperor Napoleon Bonaparte to his wife, Josephine:
"I wake filled with thoughts of you. Your portrait and the intoxicating evening we spent yesterday have left my senses in turmoil."
And he was no wuss.
If the idea still fills you with dread, we move on to a higher authority. No less than German President Horst Koehler, who recently admonished his nation to "write more love letters" instead of e-mail and phone text-messages. In a dispatch he is quoted as saying "I suggest people write more love letters. The world would be a better place for it."
Come on guys, do your part. Write.
This article last updated on Monday 4th July 2011